where is all my time.

i used to love to blog. i dont have as much time. new job, actual work. but my sister sent me a message today - why the hell dont you blog anymore?

im here. i have alot going on. im dating Steven. he really likes me. it's been like a week. I haven't given it up. I really have no interest in giving it up anytime soon. He is a nice guy, but i just don't know. he's all like i love you, i want you to have beautiful caramel skinned babies with your eyes. I am like - Hold up!

This brings to topic... why do men think I love you is the key to pussy? I like sex. Im good at it. I don't give it up until I want too.. I doesn't matter how much you claim to love me.

My crush is here this weekend... hope to see him Saturday... can't wait!

where are they all coming from?

wow ... life's ramblings.

im lunch-time blogging... im sure this against the rules.

over my peanut butter sandwhich, im pondering my life.

here's what's going on...

i had dinner with a new friend the other night, and it was very cool, i for sure have a girl crush on her.

im starving, and this sandwhich isn't doing the trick.

my mom just found out she is diabetic. i tested my sugar with her machine. I was actually afraid too. Im overweight, and pepsi runs through my veins. I was afraid it was going to be like 299! It's was 116, I was thrilled. I need to take charge of my heath.

i think I am really over D. if he really loved me he would be sad, I was sad - not happy. i am starting to think i may recover.

i didn't talk to my e-crush yesterday -- cause I was busy at work. how can you find yourself missing someone you don't know? also, we are supposed to meet at the end of the month, and i have some anxiety about it. I never get anxiety about men.

something is up with me and rebecca. im not sure, but things havent been right since Sunday. I hate when things are like this. when i call her it is like she is not receptive to talking.... i miss "us".

ive seen steven alot this week. dinner, icecream, lunch - we are going shopping tonight. he's growing on me, he is so sweet, so nice... but no chemistry...uughh...

just an update... and vent...

what's up with you?

crushes

i have a crush. an internet crush, it's completely top secret. im skeptical, i have yet to meet this man. I don't know him, but I feel like he gets me better than anyone I have ever met. I literally wait all day for him to get online. This weekend, he was not around and I miss him. Is this real? I am completely smitten. I hope and pray he is really this amazing man ... so smart and quirky and funny. I anxiously check my email.. hoping for a note. lordy, lordy - i have a crush.

music... the soundtrack of our lives

another saturday night .... the only thing I have going is a Law & Order SVU Marathon.

of course, that's got me snooping all over the internet for something to amuse me. i read an article. very interesting. there's a guy in austin who just turned his living room into a Steve Perry tribute bar. regardless of how you feel about Steve Perry or Journey ( i love faithfully), you have to admire this guy's devotion - music is literally the fabric of his life (or, more specifically, his three piece sectional). and this is a good analogy - music as an element as your life's design. or at least - for those of us less obsessed - as something to sit on. think about it: like furniture, every song has it's own unique shape, weight, pattern, and texture. it serves as a reflection of your personal taste, while also reflecting current trends.

personally, i have no music ability or talent, but i am most drawn to people who do - the connect me to the sounds i love. songs make me happy, make me cry, heal my heart and make me want to do dirty things.

what's you favorite song, what makes your heart skip a beat?

the weather is confused!

i live in florida. it is march. i am ready for the beach, warm weather, my feet in the sand. i want to bake out my hangovers. but something happened, the weather is confused. im still wearing jeans and sweatshirts. it is cold.

i love the beach. i can't wait to plan out first weekend of the summer. the beach held all the best memories from growing up. ive spent countless hours with my sister in the sand, tasting the salt, drinking pepsi from a can. not much has changed except now it's beer from plastic cups.

i want to go give my soul to the water, let it heal me...

where is your favorite vacation spot?

the world

At this moment there are 6,470,818,672 people in the world. Some are running scared, some are coming home, some tell lies to make it through the day and others are just now facing the truth. Some are evil men at war with good and some are good struggling with evil. 6 billion people in the world, 6 billion souls. And sometimes, all you need is one.

i believe in soulmates. Do you?